If you look at my life on paper, it might appear… eclectic. I’ve followed a trail that winds through the U.S. Army, art school, corporate fashion, quilting, hobby farming, parenthood, sex work, private practice, community mental health, and even owning a day spa. Add to that a gender transition, a transatlantic move to the Netherlands, a shift away from parenting—and you might think I’ve lived ten lives already.

And in a way, I have.

For most of those years, I would’ve told you I didn’t believe in anything beyond what could be measured. I was a committed atheist—believing only what could be explained through science. But underneath that, something was quietly guiding me. I made choices from an inner intuitive pulse that didn’t make sense to anyone but me, which often left to me feeling misunderstood and isolated. I followed hunches, gut feelings, invisible threads. I didn’t know it then, but Spirit was already speaking. I just didn’t yet have the language to understand it yet.

It wasn’t until a mushroom trip a little over a year ago that everything cracked open. In that experience, I saw it all—my past, my pain, my path—as part of a greater design. I didn’t find “God” in the traditional sense. I found presence. Pattern. Deep connection to the living earth and all its beings. I realized that what I had long dismissed as coincidence or chaos had been the sacred unfolding of something far wiser than I could imagine.

The journey here has not been smooth. It’s been marked by trauma, mental and physical health crises, suicidal thoughts, and addictions. For a long time, I believed those things were evidence of my brokenness—proof that I was cursed, lost, or simply not built for this world. But now I see: they were not punishments. They were teachers. Fierce ones. Gatekeepers to my becoming. They carved me open so something truer could emerge.

Looking back, I realized I joined the Army looking for adventure, to expand my capacity, and push my limits. What I found instead was a deepening awareness of my privilege, a disillusionment with conformity, and early glimpses of the systems I would later spend my life trying to escape. I went to art school seeking beauty and creative expression, and corporate fashion for the same—but found myself at odds with the culture around me. Quilting gave me comfort, a sense of legacy. Hobby farming connected me to the land (that I didn’t know how to speak with yet), but left me isolated and longing for deeper purpose. Parenthood opened me for the first time to shared collective experience, but at the same time it broke me and pushed me past every limit I had.

I’ve sought understanding through study—earning a Master’s in Counseling, training in body-based healing and parts work, and exploring inner work through meditation, mindfulness, and ancestral connection. I’ve sought healing through intimacy and edges—stepping into sex work and polyamory not out of rebellion, but out of a deep desire to reclaim my body, rewire shame, and offer affirming presence in places where silence too often prevails. And when the call came to transition out of the role of “woman,” I followed it, too—stepping into a deeper truth, not entirely sure who I’d become, but certain it was time.

Eventually, through a series of synchronicities, I met Kirien who was living in Norway at the time, and was introduced to Amsterdam where I felt a belonging and sense of “home” for the first time in my life. I came back to the US completely changed, knowing immediately that my time there had come to an end. I had to reconcile my role as a parent, and the societal shame that comes with it, with the deep call to “go” that became unbearably forceful with each day I stayed. Eventually, I recognized that parenting was a part of my journey but not my true calling—and that letting go would be just as loving as holding on.

Now, I see the full arc. What looked like detours were initiations. What felt like breakdowns were portals. Even the darkest nights were not evidence I had strayed from the path—they were the path. And I bring all of that into the space I hold now.

So no, this isn’t your average résumé. But it is the truth of how I got here. I walk with reverence, with humility, and with a joyful defiance of convention. Alongside Kirien—my beloved, my soul family, my co-creator—I now offer the kind of space we once longed for: sacred, playful, welcoming. A place for healing, remembering, and returning to what you’ve always known in your bones.

If you’re walking your own strange and beautiful path of becoming, I would be honored to walk beside you.